Elope Toronto

Winter Wedding by the City Hall Rink

2012-02-10T18:23:00.002-05:00

Memories of winter past - here is an end-of-winter wedding outside at dusk near the ice rink at Nathan Phillips square (in front of Toronto City Hall ) Then the couple (the ones with the flowers :-) went for a skate, and we held thir dog. Renovations at the plaza change things a bit now, but we hope that by summer the Peace Garden will permit some weddings by the fountain - dog or not!

Hotel Rooms make great sites for indoor winter weddings

2011-12-29T20:55:00.002-05:00

It's cold out there. The Ice rink at City Hall, High Park, the island, cherry beach in winter - all COLD, people! Red noses! Brrr! Consider splurging on a great hotel room, in one of the icons: Park Hyatt has great suites (here's a pix from their website), and the Royal York is a bit tatty, but still has some good windows, or of course you might choose the hipper Gladstone or the Drake. Or try the Hilton, or one of the new boutique hotels like St Germain.
Make sure there is enough ROOM, tho - some of the boutique hotels only have room for that great bed, and nowhere to stand. So do your research, or ask the staff for a room with a VIEW or with room to entertain.Then hold your small wedding in your room, and sign the license on the fancy table and order room service. You can always arrange to go down and take wedding photos in the lobby and in the entrance afterwards. We had a nice little elopement wedding at Sutton Place this winter for a couple from out of the city (meaning they came in from Mississauga and survived the trip). Just order a few flowers, and bring a some gravlax and champagne, and have a wonderful winter wedding.

City ofDowntown Toronto Wedding Permits for Parks - small weddings only

2011-12-27T19:57:00.001-05:00

Toronto Parks - Wedding Ceremonies and Photography

Just a headsup - as we head into 2012 wedding planning, and thoughts turn to sunny outdoor weddings. The City of Toronto has upped the permit fees for weddings in city parks. Also, the booking season for 2012 opened in November, for April - Oct, only. A few caveats:

There are very few downtown locations available, and most of those are for SMALL weddings, under 40 people. That includes Sunnyside, St James park, The Music Garden (20 people), Allan Gardens, Kew Beach pavilion (30 people). You cannot have MORE PEOPLE, people! You can't book it for 40 and bring in 60. ESPECIALLY at Allan Gardens. It's a historical greenhouse, not an event hall, and you CANNOT BRING more than about 25 people comfortably. They can't see, they can't sit anywhere, they are a hazard to the delicate plants, and it just doesn't WORK. Don't break the rules, please. Also, note that there are NO weddings permitted in High Park - due to too many people being less than thoughtful, and failing to respect the park.

Note also that wedding PHOTOGRAPHY in city parks has a minimum of 2 hours booking - longer than a wedding

Despite the single listing saying you can have a big wedding for 100 people on the islands, you can't really book an outdoor spot on Toronto islands very easily. They usually only offer you the esplanade thingie on Centre Island by the pier - which might work, but it is hot and sunny and anything but private -- full of lots of other people, including kids running around screaming. Consider the Algonquin Island Club house, an easy walk from the ferry (Gibraltar Artscape is great, but you'll need the shuttle bus). Try outside at the Rectory Cafe patio - you can walk up to the boardwalk out the back gate. Back on shore, Sunnyside has it's own problems - it's falling apart, there are no facilities, and it's funky and funny - but sometimes there are booking problems and mixups.

Check the garden of your condo! We have had some nice weddings in outdoor condo gardens (as well as rooftop patios). Try the Music Gallery at St George the Martyr - Right by the AGO - with the great rose garden outside. Or find a restaurant with a garden or patio. Or elope with 6 friends in front of Osgoode Hall or by slipping quietly into Trinity Bellwoods or another local greenspace and just standing under a tree. You can have little elopements on the Toronto islands without too much fuss. But you can't have a Bridezilla wedding in a park without a permit - and permits are not available for most parks. It's the Wedding Catch 22.

Note: the historical sites, including museums with gardens and outdoor areas, are booked separately from the PARKS department. Here is booking info for such sites as the Spadina Museum and Gardens, Todmorden museum (pix above) and other historical sites. You can also enquire about weddings at the Brickworks - and with luck, you can wander outside at Artscape on Wychwood for pix. Except at the back, where the kids are quite excitable at the waterspray fountain.

Distillery, Arta and Archaeo

2011-11-11T12:20:00.001-05:00

We had a super Distillery wedding on the hottest day of the year - we had to move from Archaeo patio to the Arta Gallery for the ceremony due to the heat . But isn't this a great pix of the bride by Lini Campbell! You can see more pix of this event on her photography blog.

2011-11-11T12:15:00.001-05:00

And here is a home wedding in Cabbagetown, with lots of good music (and perhaps too many candles!) My dress got rather warm in the back. But it makes a very nice light, doesn't it. The great photographer, Tobias Wang, has some wonderful hi-res shots, which I can't figure out how to edit. But check out his website. The soft glow is from oodles of tealights in mason jars on the floor. The back of my skirt is VERY HOT!

2011-11-11T12:10:00.001-05:00

It's been a season of nice small weddings - homes, apartments, even the glass floor at BCE place by the bank facade one evening.

Here is a delightful little legal wedding at Philosopher's Walk by the ROM. We are standing by the tiny little amphitheatre by the Music building.

gone fishing

2011-09-29T11:30:00.002-04:00

I will be 'in viaggio' for a little while for some r&r ( here I am in the "Casa di Sposa civile" or Civil Marriage House in Verona, for an idea :-). You can send mail to info@weddingsoftoronto.com, but I may not see it, as I will be drinking prosecco. I promise to check in occasionally, but I won't be accepting any weddings until after Halloween. Best wishes to everyone getting married! MB

Weddings at the Multifaith Centre, UofT

2011-09-29T11:02:00.000-04:00

There are several spaces at the MultiFaith Centre, which is in the Koffler Building at College and Spadina. The building is clean and modern, and I like the Multipurpose Room with great windows and the Main Activity Hall, which has a lovely 'light wall'.

This is a good location for a non-denominational, multicultural or non-religious wedding. ( Note, - in school season, a lot of students and other groups use the facility, so it gets booked early. Summers and school holidays, it's often quiet.You can ask me about the booking, or check HERE.) There is a real kitchen, if you're having a small reception, but there are restrictions (no meat dishes above the 2nd floor), so it's good for light things like cake and coffee and canapes - though people do bring in caterers. There is an elevator, too, because it's a modern building.

Small wedding at Hart House Chapel

2011-09-29T10:05:00.001-04:00

Here is an entirely lovely small wedding in the Hart House Chapel , (bigger youtube), which was organized in 5 days - from proposal to reception :-) The couple's children were only together in Toronto for a few days, so they organized the wedding quickly, and we Skyped in the remaining children from BC, so they could also participate. A wonderful couple, and a magical afternoon. Note, we are standing on a symbolic Ukrainian wedding runner, and then smashing TWO glasses at the end :-)

More summer locations!

2011-09-27T10:18:00.000-04:00

What a summer! From historic sites and museums - the Blue Barracks at Fort York, the Gardiner Museum, with a piper on the balcony, The ROM, the Design Exchange, and Artscape Wychwood barns, to the patio, again, at Le Select, 99 Sudbury, Globe Bistro (during Taste of the Danforth- eek!) and Globe Earth, and smaller cafes, including Balzac's coffee house, the Victory cafe (fun), the outdoor patio at Vertical, the rose garden in front of Allan Gardens as well as inside, Hart House courtyard, the cloister at Knox college, and quite a few backyards. Indoors, Rosewater, Park Hyatt and Royal York, Gladstone, then the CN tower again, this time in hi tourist time. We enjoyed both St Lawrence Hall and the fun Market Kitchen (during the busker's festival!), and returned often to the Arts and Letters club - where they are very nice indeed. Got to meet lots more photographers and musicians, as well as great couples. We're fitting in the Spherical Arts pool hall and the Berkeley and the Conservatory in the middle of Nuit Blanche and Culture Days - should be some interesting transportation problems. Last week, I think I was the only person to take the subway to the Old Mill, so I got there in plenty of time, while the wedding guests were stuck in rain traffic.

DO ENCOURAGE your guests and family to take TTC when possible...no parking problems! And you can get some great pix of the wedding party getting to the spot. Here's the groom's peeps in my own family....

Summer locations

2011-07-06T14:06:00.003-04:00

Not much time to post - too busy! But here are some recent locations:
Hart House, Enoch Turner, Le Select, Caffino, FieraMosca, Globe Bistro, Archaeo, the Berkeley, Graydon, Allan Gardens, Canoe, Toronto Islands, Les Provences Delices, Trinity Bellwoods, Royal Conservatory (and Philosopher's walk), St. Lawrence Market Kitchen - lots of backyards and balconies - and even the Toronto Necropolis Chapel. Yes indeedy, that's us in the sunset, under the lynch gate (across from Riverdale farm). Must find links...

Heels on Wheels - the Day of Delight wedding

2011-06-19T22:14:00.001-04:00

Heels on Wheels | dandyhorse magazine, Day of Delight wedding
We had a fabulously wonderful wedding at Dufferin Grove Park today, in the Day of Delight Festival: Giant puppets, a tandem bike, a salsa band, and many other 'delights'. Pix to come soon, but here is a teaser...

As the bride says: "Day of Delight is Clay & Paper Theatre’s annual celebration of love, courtship and desire. This festival is all about leaving cynicism behind, and celebrating love. What better place could you think of to hold a wedding? I’m not a big fan of traditional weddings. I’ve been to a million of them, and they’re all the same. Boring. Most ceremonies are constrained by outdated traditions and say very little about the people who are involved in them. Day of Delight has theatre, music, installation and participatory projects including Cardbordia (an entire land made of cardboard) and a musical bicycle parade! How cool is that? We want to say “Hey, this thing we’ve got here is pretty great. Let’s celebrate!”

Coping with rain and wedding locations.

2011-05-28T14:57:00.001-04:00

In uncertain weather, you can try to book indoor greenhouses. Here is another Allan Gardens wedding, when we were fortunate to have (almost) the entire place to ourselves. But do see our other post on Allan Gardens' disturbing policies of over-booking. Try for off-hours bookings, midweek or early or nearer closing. And expect crowds, who are not complying with the contract they signed with the City.
Pity, really.

The view of the Rose Garden from the St James Pavilion is lovely right now, tho.

Racing to the altar: couple ties knot after Toronto Marathon - thestar.com

2011-05-16T17:30:00.004-04:00

Racing to the altar: couple ties knot after Toronto Marathon - thestar.com

Here are Rodney and Jessica, who changed clothes quite a bit and got married in their West end house in late afternoon. It was still a bit rainy, so we held the wedding in their back patio - after Rodney draped the band saw with some white fabric to make a license-signing area.. They cooked all the food for the reception as well. Truly a wonderful wedding, showing that rain couldn't dampen the race or the wedding - and I got to hold their medals, too! --- and their wedding cake had a model of them riding a Cervelo tandem bike (does that even exist?) Happy wedding!

Caffino - big windows in the rain

2011-05-16T09:18:00.001-04:00

Here's a pix of Caffino, (Toronto Carpet Factory) down on King West at Dufferin, from a Groupon coupon today. We had a lovely wedding in this room, quickly moved inside from the private courtyard because of the rain, but the windows are so large they allow lots of natural light. Good Italian food, nice big atmosphere - industrial detailing.

Candlelight wedding @ Mjolk gallery in Roncesvalles

2011-04-20T17:25:00.002-04:00

Mjolk is a stylish Scandinavian store in the west end @ Roncesvalles. As a Danish granny myself, I was honoured to participate in the wedding of the owners of the gallery - who cleared out the space, added a retro 1950s fireplace, and served wonderful Scandinavian food for friends and family in the showroom - with a great jazz combo in the window space. The lovely pictures are by Danijela Pruginic

Beach weddings - almost time

2011-04-03T10:09:00.000-04:00

We're off to Cherry Beach today for a spring birthday picnic, and that reminded me of a very nice sunset wedding last summer. Everyone in bare feet, couple in linen shirts and pants, and a few dogs rumpling around. We signed the license sitting on a log on the beach. This works very well for small weddings - but you need to be aware that there will always be other people around, having their own beach time. They'll probably congratulate you (if they even notice)

Can my (sister, dad, uncle, friend, neighbour) marry us?

2011-03-10T14:29:00.003-05:00

We've been asked this a lot more lately. We also often asked - "Can you just 'sign the papers' to make the wedding legal, while my friend marries us?

The answer is simple.

Your friends and family can certainly be involved, and can do many of the NON-legal parts of a wedding.

If your friend is NOT a Registered Marriage Officiant, however, you need a legally registered Marriage Officiant to conduct the legal parts of the wedding ceremony. We cannot just 'sign the papers'. A wedding is a legally witnessed contract between two parties. The Marriage Officiant must preside over required parts of the actual ceremony.

Here are some choices:

1) You can have a simple legal wedding ceremony before your family celebration, along with your two witnesses, and save the music and readings (and rings, which are not legally required) for another ceremonial wedding celebration. This is the same concept as having a legal wedding in Ontario before you fly off for a ceremonial resort wedding. It's the same as Prince Charles getting legally married at the Registry Office in the morning, before changing clothes and going to the Cathedral for a wedding blessing after lunch.

2) You can invite your friend to participate in your wedding, and the legal officiant will do the legal bits, and your friend or relative can do the family bits. This takes a little planning, but it works quite well. Family or friends can welcome guests, offer readings and best wishes, present the rings, and ask everyone to welcome the couple at the end, for example.

Here is the previous post on this topic, with a few more details. We can also send you examples of ceremonies with participation by others. Happy planning!

ALLAN Gardens can be a ZOO on weekends.

2011-03-09T11:14:00.000-05:00

We have had many lovely small weddings at Allan Gardens.

BUT, when we arrived on Saturday at 4 for our little wedding, there were 3 other wedding parties running around Behaving Very Badly.

Although the City states that there is only room for about 20 people, some clients regularly ignore this requirement. One wedding had over 80 people crammed into the central greenhouse on Saturday, and they were (completely illegally) passing round trays of food, letting kids run wild, putting their coats on the flowerss, and generally ignoring the fact that we were in a GREENHOUSE. The caretakers got them to ditch the food, but they admitted that clients regularly ignore the regulations, that weekends can be awful, and many people treat the gardens as a RECEPTION HALL, and forget it's a greenhouse. They actually have to wash it down with soap in the evenings after the weddings leave. Sundays are just as bad, they said.

It's heaven on a slow weekday, and we love it a lot. But on Saturdays, they often book 3 weddings an hour, and let the parties fight over the space. Not to mention photography shoots, and other intrusions. Be warned, and pick a weekday early, or at dusk, if possible. Sad.

SKYPING a wedding ceremony

2011-02-22T14:42:00.000-05:00

People have asked me more frequently about a SKYPED wedding. We have been doing these for a couple of years - and were featured in a Toronto Star article about a SKYPED ceremony to Lebanon for a mom who couldn't come.
Last week, we had a wedding in Kengsington Market, and Skyped to Romania and the Netherlands, so both parents could watch the wedding.
Of course you cannot GET MARRIED by Skype. You both have to be in the same room, with your officiant and your witnesses. SKYPE is a way to share your ceremony with loved ones who are unable to attend. However, you can broadcast your ceremony to friends and family who are not present - whether overseas, or unfortunately detained, or unable to travel. You just set up a couple of laptops, ask your attendants to hold them, dial in BEFORE the ceremony and establish connection, and arrange yourselves so everyone can see.

Urban wedding at South of Temperance on Adelaide

2011-02-21T12:59:00.000-05:00

We had a nice cheerful wedding at South of Temperance on Yonge and Adelaide last night. They cleared this raised area by the fireplace for the ceremony, and we had 60 people in chairs in the restaurant part. You could also go outside in better weather. The fireplace was lovely, and the staff was helpful and warm. Lots of nice light through the overhead skylights. Simple (generous) food from the semi-open kitchen, big bar. They popped the couples slide show on the overhead television monitors...

UK- Moonlight marriages get official blessing as night-time ban is lifted

2011-02-11T19:45:00.001-05:00

Independent, UK
"I'm getting married in the morning, ding-dong the bells are going to chime...."

If you've ever thought about why all Brit weddings are around noontime - things are about to change (except for CofE):

"Couples who want to marry in the moonlight will soon get their wish granted, as the UK ban on night-time weddings is lifted. Historic legislation requiring that ceremonies are held during the day is to be scrapped as part of a drive to remove outdated laws.

Although the move is unlikely to a lead to Las Vegas-style wedding chapels operating 24 hours a day, ministers explained it was not the Government's place to dictate when couples should be allowed to marry. Church weddings originally had to take place between 8am and noon, but the hours were later extended to 3pm and 6pm. The same hours were adopted for civil ceremonies when they were introduced in 1837, although many registrars work for even shorter periods.

The rules for Church of England weddings are sent down in canon law and cannot be altered by the state. But the restrictions on civil ceremonies are to be swept away in the new Protection of Freedoms Bill. James Brokenshire, a Home Office minister, said the move on weddings had been inspired by comments from the public during a consultation on which laws should be abolished.." A spokeswoman for the Church of England said it had no plans to alter the hours during which wedding ceremonies were conducted.

of course in Toronto, it's not the moonlight, it's the temperature. We've done some moonlight weddings in winter, but my fingers we so cold it was hard to turn the pages...

Campbell House Wedding

2011-02-04T18:21:00.002-05:00

We had a lovely afternoon family wedding today at Campbell House, Queen Street by Osgoode Hall. About 25 people sat in the parlour, and the couple came down the stairs together. A lovely, intimate afternoon, and the guests were invited to enjoy the museum as well, and then everyone went off to celebrate. A lovely Regency afternoon in the heart of the city.

Here is the brides room (ballroom) and the wonderful staircase, for entrances and pictures.

Here is a link to enquire about Campbell House rentals (and inhouse catering)

Valentine's Day Elopements - Monday, Monday...

2011-02-04T18:02:00.001-05:00

Valentine's Day Surprise Wedding.

It seems people are superstitious about SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 13, so engagements and dinners and weddings are mostly happening on Monday, February 14 this year. And Mondays are perfect for a very quiet elopement - even for brunch.

Restaurants are prepared for elopements (they have the champagne ready) but not always prepared for actual weddings. For a small elopement, you can still book a "Valentine's day romantic meal", and pre-order champagne, and ask for the 'quiet table in the corner' (probably crowded, on Valentines Day). If you can get the 'romantic corner', or even a private room or the back of the restaurant, then let the front of house know you're going to actually stand up in that corner for 10 minutes and get married. And THEN you'll drink the champagne and order dinner.

We suggest you don't START calling for a booking by talking about a 'wedding', or the venue will assume you want fuss and waiters and flash photos and flowers and chairs and all sorts of waiterly attention, on their busy night. But if you simply book a 'romantic dinner' and then your party essentially stands up for a few 'toasts', it's closer to an engagement, a birthday or a family celebration, which they can easily handle. But a good tip is still a good plan!

Where to get great gluten-free baked goods

2011-01-31T23:42:00.003-05:00

From BlogTo: Bunner's Bake Shop in the Junction seems to be a good idea for wedding treats - not sure about their catering specs, just call them - but they do offer Gluten-Free treats, as well as vegan. And they seem to have expansion plans.

Winter Wedding Locations

2011-01-31T15:02:00.000-05:00

Winter Elopements - some places are quite lovely in winter, that are full of people and tourists in the warmer weather. I think this is the H20 Waterpark (I thought it was Sugar Beach) from the pix of the day in Torontoist.. But if you put on your snowboots and tramp down, what a great view for a little elopement. And at least in this picture, no yellow snow :-)

Come Up To My Room - Gladstone Art Show

2011-01-28T14:47:00.001-05:00

Come Up To My Room
Want to see inside the Gladstone?
Every year, the Gladstone Hotel holds an event they call Come Up To My Room, where artists take over empty rooms on the building's second floor and redecorate them to suit their own particular sensibilities. Being there is kind of like attending a party at the home of a rich and crazy interior designer, and snooping through all his bedchambers. Eleven rooms—twelve, counting the downstairs ballroom—were transformed as part of this year's show (part of the Toronto International Design Festival). Admission is $10, and exhibit continues through Sunday Jan 30.

Teatree Cafe - new vegan cafe on the Danforth

2011-01-21T14:20:00.001-05:00

Teatree Cafe - in my nabe.
Who knows, maybe they cater weddings? (small ones?)
They close at 6 - wonder if they'd hold a small wedding?
Must wander down and ask - and see if there are any cupcakes left..

CBC: Thoroughly Modern Marriage documentary

2011-01-18T09:38:00.001-05:00

Thoroughly Modern Marriage
Thursday January 20, 2011 at 9 pm on CBC-TV
Repeating: Friday January 21, 2011 at 10 pm ET/PT on CBC News Network

We were contacted about this documentary on modern marriage - which includes a discussion of civil weddings, the trend to marrying later in life, common law marriage, same sex weddings, and all the other topics discussed on the radio this morning, including the decline in religious-type weddings. We noticed they did not, in the end, mention Humanist ceremonies, as an alternative to being married by a Justice of the Peace or at City Hall. However, it is clear that the trend toward a different type secular wedding and commitment ceremony is growing.
They did discuss the decision of couples who have decided to ask their friends and family to be present as they make "a public statement of their private commitment to each other" (a phrase from the beginning of a Humanist marriage ceremony). We were pleased that they also mentioned that couples are making this decision at many different phases of their relationship - some have been together for many years, and have homes and children, some have decided to have a party and celebrate their partnership by getting married, and some older couples have finally decided to celebrate and formalize their long-term union with a simple legal marriage ceremony.
It was nice to have a fairly realistic view of modern marriage - and a few statistics as well. Enjoy the stories of the couples, and write us with any questions.

Winter wedding in ANOTHER park

2011-01-12T14:42:00.002-05:00

This is from my dear colleague Eileen, and the location is Bow Bridge, in Central Park, in Manhattan. I used to do these winter weddings every year, sometimes for Aussies or even brave Canadians (often from Montreal).This cold couple are eloping Brits, who hit the big snowstorm in NY last week (though this day was between the two snow dumps). They were red of nose and cold of toes, but what a great picture!

New Years winter elopement in High Park

2011-01-03T11:07:00.000-05:00

Most of the action was on the Ice Rink on Sunday, so the five of us walked into the Japanese garden, and stood on the bridge by the frozen waterfall. Great shots from the bridge below by our photographer! Our fingers got a bit frozen, but hearts were warm, and the chickadees came to comment on what we were doing. After a short ceremony and some great pictures in the snow, we hiked back to the Grenadier cafe for hot chocolate and the signing of the Marriage License. A memorable mid-day wedding to start the year.

Lovely New Years Eve wedding in Cabbagetown

2011-01-03T11:03:00.000-05:00

We had a romantic and moving wedding in a candle-lit tent (in the backyard), with family and friends cosily arranged inside, and everyone reading poetry and warm thoughts. One partner was Native, so we also had ritual drumming, smudging, and peaceful reflection to begin, and then ended with some wonderful winter squash soup to warm up! A memorable and happy evening.

Soltice Winter Wedding in the Beaches by moonlight

2010-12-21T13:45:00.000-05:00

First, a candlelit wedding at Kew Beach pavilion - just a few of us, standing in a circle in the cold, and watching the moon. Then we went to Sauvignon Bistro on Queen Street East to sign the license and drink champagne. (They have a private room at the back, which could probably be used for a small simple wedding. There were 12 of us.)
Then I went home and set the alarm and we got up at 3am for the Solstice Eclipse - and the meteor shower!! Happy Winter Solstice to all.

Civil Weddings in Italy - my vacation shot

2010-12-13T15:46:00.003-05:00

Just returned from our (45th) wedding anniversary trip to Venice and Verona (hurrah!) I did some touring of Civil Marriage chambers - include this wonderful Municipal wedding room in Verona, near 'Juliet's tomb' (which isn't 'hers', of course). I love renaissance domestic frescoes - what a pretty place for a wedding!

Parks, Forestry and Recreation : Permits - Wedding Ceremonies and Photography

2010-12-04T20:42:00.001-05:00

Parks, Forestry and Recreation : Permits - Wedding Ceremonies and Photography
Here is a new web page for booking Toronto Parks for weddings and events. (Note all the typos, my goodness!)
* Application Start Date:Apply for your 2011 wedding permit beginning November 1st, 2010.
* Permit Season: April 30th to October 30th

I'm not sure what the booking season means, if you want a nice winter wedding any any of these locations...

They have also lowered the capacity of the Music Garden from 40 to 20, as well as reducing the capacity of St James to 40. Please note our other post on Sunnyside, as this is also a problematic location.
I'm not sure the prices are current (I think Allan Gardens is about $104 instead of $96) but call to make sure. I also don't know WHERE the location on the Toronto islands for 100 people is -- or the Ashbridges Bay location. If you find out, let me know!

St. Lawrence Market Kitchen wedding

2010-11-27T20:44:00.000-05:00

Lovely family wedding tonight at the St. Lawrence Market Kitchen (Mezzanine). I had some photos, but I seem to have left my camera at the reception, alas! Here is the window arch where we held the ceremony, and these tables were re-arranged down the center of the hall to serve as dining tables (with preserves and flowers) for 45 people to sit to dinner. The view out the window is of King Street, the Flatiron Building and the CN tower, all lined up. Of course the caterers used the market kitchen ovens, and it was all full of candlelight and fun. The only drawback was the roasting meatsmoke drifting up from the market itself which might be noticed if you have a lot of vegetarians -- but the market IS open of course on a busy Saturday. The price is reasonable, and the view is great for a smaller (30-60?) person wedding. The specs say it can hold up to 100. Rental specs here.

Wedding idea: Toronto Christmas Market, December 3 to 12, 2010

2010-11-25T18:08:00.001-05:00

Toronto Christmas Market, December 3 to 12, 2010
Well, it's not REALLY a Bavarian Christmas Market, tho' there will be Alpine Dancers - but if you're really adventurous, you could probably have a little guerilla elopement at the Distillery District on the week of the Christmas Market - there will be a tree!

We're going to have a little winter wedding at Nathan Phillips Square in December (on the rink), but you might check out this site too, if you want to have a quick ceremony and then some celebratory drinks!

Nice fall elopement at Trinity Bellwoods Park

2010-10-18T15:37:00.002-04:00

Yes, it can be done! A beautiful fall day, and a circle of us standing in the fallen leaves while dogs ran on the left and workout mommies jogged with strollers on the right of us. We signed the license at a picnic table and took pictures by the gates.
Remember, you can't officially BOOK a park like Trinity for a wedding - but if you're just having an impromptu celebration, with a handful of people (we had 8) you can usually just turn up and have a small, brief wedding. And hugs all around.

Very pretty candlelight wedding at Enoch Turner

2010-10-16T14:04:00.001-04:00

You can have a bigger wedding in the vaulted gothic hall, but a little wedding in the schoolhouse room is lovely. Move the benches around to make an aisle, enter through the gothic arched door, and it's warm and intimate. Be warned, the light is low. So we moved some of the stanchion lights. There ARE outlets, so you could bring other (period appropriate) lights, and we had nice tealights on the table and windows, so if you're considering it, visit AT DUSK to see what the light is like. Absolutely great downtown location on the King streetcar @ Trinity.

Pretty Guildwood wedding on 10-10-10

2010-10-13T12:12:00.001-04:00

Here we are, on the cliffs at Guildwood, at 10:10am on 10/10/10 (yes indeedy!) We had a permit - very important for Guildwood - but it was really quiet early in the morning. There were flocks of birds and gently falling leaves, and it was rather magical, actually!

However, it's NOT on the subway, of course, so you'll need a car to get there - or at least pick people up from Kennedy subway. It's worth the trek on a beautiful fall day. Be warned, the wedding limos were pulling up as we left....

High Park Wedding - small and impromptu

2010-10-13T10:05:00.000-04:00

This was a lovely little wedding - we signed the license on the bench where the couple used to meet when they were in school. Note: You can't really get a permit for a BIG wedding in High Park any more - too many people abused the privilege. But you can stand around in a little group of 5 or 6 people and have a private wedding or elopement - as long as you are discreet. Just find a little spot off the regular tourist areas (and then come back and take a few pictures and sign the license)

Sunnyside - an unsettling jurisdiction

2010-10-12T23:38:00.002-04:00

Yes, Sunnyside is cool. In a peeling-paint, industrial abandoned, spent-cigarette butt and pigeon-guano way ... and the light is great. We had a wonderful wedding there on Sunday, even if the gate got stuck...and the beach volleyball game finally moved away too - so we could hear ourselves.

BUT, it also seems to be jointly owned/booked/managed by the City AND the owners of the Grenadier Cafe in High Park. And they both dispute who books it. SO this weekend the High Park people had 'leased' it to a film production company, and the caretakers turned away three weddings - we were fortunate, as they weren't filming Sunday. Permits - Schpermits! Too bad, so sad... It's very hard to get to the bottom of the booking muddle, and in the meantime, that guano keeps piling up (filling up the pretty white billowing sheets suspending from the 2nd story - just don't look too hard at all those things that look like grey toothpaste....) The filming company was turning the downstairs courtyard into a "Venezuelan Market" - which, with the peeling paint, was just about right....

Wedding spaces: The Young Center, Distillery District

2010-09-28T15:20:00.000-04:00

As the mom of an acting family, I think weddings in Theatres are wonderful. The new Young Center in the Distillery District has lots of cool spaces. You can see some wedding setups on their Site Rental pages, here. Like other event spaces, the background is cool enough that you don't need much additional decoration - a swag or two of tulle and a few flowers are probably more than enough - and the setting itself is interesting and of course already in the Distillery District. Remember, it's used by the Theatre on performance nights - so I'm not sure about weekend availability...

Event spaces: the Richmond

2010-09-28T14:19:00.000-04:00

We had a trendy wedding at The Richmond last month. This is a view from the top of the balcony, where we signed the license. The room is bare, airy, and transformable - though we did have to stand on the first step of the stairs, with the couple on either side, and then march up the stairs to the balcony (which is darkish) to sign the papers. Good for a casual, trendy, wedding - where most people can stand for the ceremony, and you want good music, talking, and lighter refreshments.

Wedding: Changing your Facebook Status

2010-09-27T22:31:00.000-04:00

Well, the most lovely thing happened - we had a small home wedding, and were just about to cut the cake, when the groom unaccountably excused himself and went to the computer - we all watched, a little bemused, until he got up, smiling, and said "I just changed my facebook status - I've been waiting to do that for months..."

Here's the fun times with technology.
And then we opened the champagne - I don't think there's an app for that....

Two pretty Hart House weddings, University of Toronto

2010-09-27T14:09:00.002-04:00

Two pretty Hart House weddings - not in the big Great Hall, but upstairs in the Music Room, and the Debates Room.(In fact one wedding had the ceremony in the Debates room, and moved to the Music Room for the seated reception). One couple actually met playing volleyball at Hart House, so the venue was sentimental as well. The acoustics are great - you don't really need the mike setup, and the light is wonderful, but watch for the backlighting in the window at dusk. You don't need much other decoration, as the wood and stone are enough. It's human-sized, and what could be better for a friendly, warm, family wedding. We had a guitarist for one, and a piano for the other, and they didn't need any amplification either...; Warn guests about parking, and why not just come by subway @ Museum, walk down Philosopher's walk, and enjoy the view.

Booking: Hart House Events

Discreet Patio Weddings - Distillery District Eloping

2010-09-17T23:42:00.001-04:00

There are always a zillion brides at the Distillery District, and we often do weddings at the usual venues. But we also did a quick and lovely elopement last week. I tweeted about this, but you can't edit tweets, and it was confusing - so here's a clarification.

We met the couple and their parents on the patio at Archaeo - (you can't reserve the Patio cabanas, I think - but it was early, so we found a nice one with a table and sofa chairs).
The bride and groom put on some flowers, we stood under the patio umbrellas, and had a short, lovely ceremony. The DJ (who we'd met before) turned off the housemusic and played a couple of songs for them, other people on the patio lifted their drinks and applauded, and then everyone went back to their own premises, and we signed the license and had some champagne. Then I took the streetcar home. Lovely evening.

You can do this on most patios, the problems/challenges are usually the same: music (befriend the DJ), weather (nada to do), reservations (choose a non-busy time), house rules (be discreet, or warn the Captain you are going to make a little speech to your group, or let them in on the secret and order champagne). 15 minutes, duly married, toasts for all.

Suggested location: Children's Peace Theatre

2010-09-17T23:35:00.000-04:00

The Children's Peace Theatre is in the old Massey Estate, on Dawes Road in Scarborough - a 15 minutes walk from Victoria Station. It has a large outdoor amphitheatre, a sunporch (holds 10), a hall (holds 30-75), and various other configurations. So it's not for HUGE weddings, but would do nicely for smallish ones. A couple we know is going to hold their reception there, after being married in a downtown location. A good cause, and a lovely setting.

Black Creek village - candles and weather and wind and wildness

2010-09-14T19:17:00.003-04:00

We had a lovely wedding at the village - candlelit ceremony in the church, and then a walk to the reception pavilion.However, though the reception pavilion is well-roofed, it can be cold in the shoulder seasons if the wind comes up. (And very hot in the church in the summer, of course!)

Remember the obvious: Pioneer settings, camp settings, conservation settings (Kortwright) and anything outdoors is NOT climate-controlled, so plan accordingly, warn your guests to bring wraps, bug spray (and a change of shoes - high heels on grass and cobblestone are treacherous). It may be obvious to you, but it won't be clear to those who haven't visited the venue.

Fall weddings - spaces and places

2010-09-14T19:05:00.000-04:00

Beware of crab apples in the grass! Slippery slopes under the trees right now.

You can't predict outdoor weather, so you really need a backup plan (which is more than umbrellas). We're planning a hot air balloon wedding in a couple of weeks (we hope!) but it's been so windy this year that a lot of the air rides have been canceled. Indoor/outdoor locations mean gazebos, patios with tents and roofs, condo rooms with terraces, and somewhere to get warm as well as stay out of the wind. Boat weddings are delightful, but its going to get dark sooner, and very few people will be up on the top deck once the sun drops. It's almost better to plan the INDOOR wedding, and then hope for an outdoor event if possible.

Weddings for Older Couples: Elopements for Seniors and Baby-boomers

2010-09-11T10:54:00.002-04:00

We've had a few nice small weddings lately for older people - not just second marriages , but for people who are actually ELOPING at 64 (or earlier, of course, but since I'm that exact age, the Beatles refrain naturally runs through my head - how did I get here already? grin)

Most of these couples have been living together for quite some time - often decades - but just never got married. Some come to us because of financial planning, or other retirement concerns which suddenly pop up as you are nearing retirement. Some are doing things as practical as going on holiday, and are concerned about health issues. SOME are simply romantic, and want a small private wedding (sometimes with adult children - and grandchildren in tow) to celebrate their decision.

We've had the ceremonies in our office, in their homes, backyards, and at restaurants - sometimes with family, sometimes with long-time friends, sometimes just the couple (and their witnesses) but the weddings have been lovely, simple, and very touching.

The words we say change a bit when you have been keeping house together for 30 years - we often talk about the couples life not changing, but simply becoming stronger. We can talk about the years they've spent together, and their plans for the future, or simply celebrate their partnership.

"...for N & N their relationship has not changed – it has endured thirty years. Today their relationship simply grows stronger, made more powerful by their pledge to each other to support and love one another through all of life’s joys and challenges. For marriage is not the beginning, but the maturing of love - it is love freely given and gladly returned and it is both ordinary and extraordinary because it is simply about everyday living.."

Here is a reading I like to use for couples who are 'getting married at 64'
Captain Corelli’s mandolin, Louis de Bernieres.
Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two

Two ROM wedding tales: Royal Ontario Museum & Philosopher's Walk weddings

2010-09-01T18:47:00.001-04:00

On the weekend, we had a big lovely wedding in the Rotunda of the ROM (Royal Ontario Museum) Lots of people - great food, and a super band. I may write a note about it, as it was quite special - a secular / Hindu ceremony, with candles, some traditional elements, and some modern multicultural elements. Great acoustics in the Rotunda!

Today, however, I met a couple inside the Museum, and we went out into Philosopher's Walk, next door (between the ROM and the Royal Conservatory of Music), and we found some nice students relaxing on the path who offered to serve as witnesses, and we held a small impromptu wedding in under the trees and sat on the grass to sign the license. Then the new couple went BACK into the ROM to explore the Mineral Gallery. Because it was Free Admission Day! (They planned to zoom down to the AGO afterwards to take in 2 free museums on their wedding day. Two styles, two events, with the ROM between them...

Drake Hotel Wedding Location

2010-08-28T19:28:00.002-04:00

And down the block from the Gladstone, still on Queen Street West, is the Drake Hotel , of course. We also had a bit of a retro themed wedding, but that seems natural in the SkyYard (roof deck). We used the tiki bar as a backdrop, and signed the license on the bar. Fortunately, the rain held off! So all the guests could crowd around the middle area. The food and drink service was great - as was the boardroom area for the bride, and for signing things and collecting ourselves. The guests had a ball.

Gladstone Hotel wedding location

2010-08-28T19:20:00.007-04:00

We've done weddings at the Gladstone Hotel in suites, in the tower room, and in the ballroom - left. (I've actually been inside every 2nd floor room, since my kids did the Gladstone Variations play cycle there a few years ago).

Today's wedding was a retro theme, which fits in beautifully with the Gladstone. And of course elderly guests (and anyone else) will enjoy the antique elevator lift. And the wonderful bathrooms. It's great for a brunch wedding, too.
.

Toronto Wedding Venues - discussion on Chowhound

2010-08-28T14:37:00.001-04:00

Sometimes couples discuss wedding planning and venues on Bride-y websites (you know, ze knot, bridezilla, etc.). But for foodies, the discussion threads on Canadian ChowHound are fun - they talk about the catering and food, not just the decorations. Most of the places people chat about are downtown Toronto locations where we've held the ceremony first, and then cocktails and dinner on-site.

The usual suspects are on the list - Canoe, St Lawrence Hall, Berkeley, SteamWhistle, ROM, (no one has mentioned the Royal Conservatory yet, which I enjoy as a venue), Distillery Restaurants, and the 'event' mansions - such as Graydon Hall, McLean House, -- and the discussion includes the food at places like the Gladstone Hotel, where we were today with about 80 people - wonderful wedding!

Posters also compare service and pricing - from Carlu to 1King West, etc. There are a few unusual listings, such as the Ballet School Atrium, but not too many restaurants on the boards. Most couples in the threads are looking for larger weddings (100-200), though some restaurants can squeeze in 80-100 (like Terroni, in the side room), but you may have to consider event spaces (Berkeley, Arcadian Court, St Lawrence Hall) for larger groups.

Fun to find discussions of menus, especially this discussion about a specific menu (Canadian, Chinese, Indian) and how it was developed. Yum!

Toronto Island Weddings - logistics

2010-08-18T13:12:00.001-04:00

Most of the yacht clubs have their own launches, which leave from different quays downtown. You can get a water taxi, but it's expensive, and they get very busy at certain times.

If you're taking the ferry, to an elopement, the Rectory Cafe, one of the clubhouses, etc. - be sure to plan for the TICKET LINES. Mid-week, it's daycamps and tourists, weekends, it's the whole city. There is only one booth that takes visa, you can't buy your tickets online, and the single automatic ticket dispenser is terrible and only prints one ticket at a time. The best idea is to go a few days before and buy a block of tickets (minimum is $10, for about 5.80, you get a discount) they are good 'forever', and you can skip lines.

Once you get there, it's easy. Elopements on the picnic grounds under a tree, the beach, even by the fountains on Centre Island - nice gardens. But the ferrying over of guests and party is difficult if the streetcar is late, the line is long, etc. EARLY is better. About 11 things start to heat up.

Get Married on the Toronto Island

2010-08-10T18:10:00.004-04:00

So you want to Get Married on the Island
We just had a lovely wedding at the Rectory Cafe (Ward's island) - the weather cooperated, so the ceremony was on the terrace, the pix on the boardwalk, and the the wedding supper on the patio (lovely food). Here is a link to other venues on the island - the Wards and Algonquin Island clubhouses (shown here). I think you can also rent St Andrew's Church (see this link for email to enquire) they now have an accessible kitchen.

John Lundberg: The Tragic History Of Chelsea's Wedding Poem

2010-08-09T11:17:00.001-04:00

John Lundberg: The Tragic History Of Chelsea Clinton's Wedding Poem
Perhaps some of you might be interested in this --

Leo Marks's poem "The Life That I Have," read as part of Chelsea Clinton and Mark Mezvinsky wedding ceremony, seems on the surface to be the perfect wedding poem. It's straightforward and employs simple language-- easy for the guests to understand and appreciate with one listen-- and it comes across as genuinely emotional with its incantatory and almost pleading repetition of "yours and yours and yours." Here's the full text of the poem:

The life that I have
Is all that I have
And the life that I have  
Is yours

The love that I have  
Of the life that I have  
Is yours and yours and yours.

A sleep I shall have  
A rest I shall have  
Yet death will be but a pause

For the peace of my years  
In the long green grass  
Will be yours and yours  
And yours

The emotion behind the poem, it turns out, was genuine and intense. Marks wrote it on Christmas Eve in 1943 for his girlfriend Ruth, who had just died in a plane crash. In his 1998 memoir "Between Silk and Cyanide," Marks wrote of the poem's purpose, "I transmitted a message to her which I'd failed to deliver when I'd had the chance."

That's heartbreaking enough, but there was more tragedy to come. When Marks wrote the poem, he was serving as chief code breaker/cryptographer for Winston Churchill's famed Special Operations Executive, the group tasked with encoding allied messages and cracking German codes. A mathematical genius, Marks reportedly cracked Charles de Gaulle's personal cipher during a spare moment on the toilet.

When Marks joined the Special Operations Executive, it was common practice to use well-known poems as the ciphers for encoding messages. Marks found this appalling, as any Nazi with a book of British classics could crack the ciphers, so he took to using his original poems instead.

"The Life That I Have," turned out to be an ideal poem to use as a cipher, with its "absence of the high-value Scrabble letters like 'z' and 'x' or words with double letters that make code easier to decipher." Marks eventually gave it to a beautiful, young agent with the French resistance named Violette Szabo to use as her personal code. Before the end of the war, Szabo was compromised then tortured and killed by the Nazis. Her travails, along with the poem, are remembered in a 1958 film called Carve Her Name With Pride. You can watch a scene from the movie HERE

Nice little article in the Star about a Toronto Island Wedding

2010-08-04T14:36:00.005-04:00

This was a great wedding - a couple of scientists, a ferry trip, a rainy day, a SKYPE call overseas, and the STAR article mostly got it right.

The important thing is that Hala and Florian got married - and we called up their mum in Lebanon on Skype so she could hear the ceremony. And the food was great, and the Rectory Cafe was lovely, And a great time was had by all - I love Hala's dress, and Florians shoes!

This is the 4th wedding this summer where the groom wore track shoes. Last week the BRIDE surprised the groom with black adidas under her wedding dress. Great style!

Rainy Day weddings - plan B is important

2010-07-25T08:53:00.001-04:00

While I don't mind standing under an umbrella in a soft rain (which can be romantic), your granny and your friend in the new 5 inch heels, and people who DID get dressed up for you may mind, a lot. Last night we had to move a wedding ceremony from the Music Garden, where the metal gazebo has no actual roof, to the reception site at the last minute. That meant the groom had to wait at the garden for all of those people who were still coming to the first site, even though the skies opened and it should have been obvious the rain wasn't going to stop.

Please have a "Plan B" - and a way to CONTACT your guests.

You will usually need to contact them BEFORE they set out for the wedding -- or it's going to be a logistical nightmare (in the rain) trying to get everyone to your other location. Appoint a contact person who is NOT in the wedding party, and give out their phone number to everyone. Post them at the original location to redirect - so the groom won't have to stay at the original site. Have a rain time already prepared, which is usually an hour later than the original wedding, so you have time to set up.

If you have the ability to simply move inside at the same location, talk to the site staff in enough time for them to adjust. We often have a ceremony area roughly set up in another room, and all you'll need to do is move chairs, or set up some chairs for family and older guests and have other guests stand at the back

Respect your guests - their clothes and shoes and hairdos - and respect your musicians - string players can't cope with rain, and they won't want their instruments to get wet. Electronics can't get wet - so ditch the DJ and let them go inside. In case of passing showers, you can always reasssemble outside for post-ceremony pix, toasts, and group pictures.

reminder: You must get your OWN marriage license!

2010-07-21T18:12:00.001-04:00

It may be a function of the summer heat - but a few people have been confused lately about the legal process of getting married. YOU MUST GO TO CITY HALL AND OBTAIN YOUR OWN MARRIAGE LICENSE. BY YOURSELVES (or at least one of you, with the other persons signed application and ID).

THE OFFICIANT DOES NOT OBTAIN YOUR MARRIAGE LICENSE. Nope. No way. I'm not getting married TO YOU - I'm officiating at your wedding. To the person you love.

Once you have gone to the Marriage Bureau, and satisfied the City Clerk that you meet the conditions for getting married - proved your identity, shown that you are of age, and not currently married to someone else, and not related to the other prospective spouse in one of the excluded categories - and filled out all the questions with the names of your parents, your full legal names (yes, you have to use all those names on your birth certificate) and your legal address, etc., and paid the fee, you will obtain an official license-to-be-married.

THEN, you can bring the license to a REGISTERED MARRIAGE OFFICIANT, along with your intended, two witnesses and your IDs, and you can get married.

If you have any questions, please check with your officiant and with City Hall. Turning up at kind Father O'Flaherty's in the pouring rain on the Brooklyn waterfront to be married in the parlor with him in his slippers only happens in movies. And trust me - a former Brooklynite - it doesn't happen in Brooklyn, either.

of bars, patios, and wind tunnels and outdoor weddings

2010-07-20T16:09:00.001-04:00

If you read Toronto Life, Now and the Eye, you'd think Toronto is known for summer patios.
We've done a number of weddings on restaurant patios - and mostly, the result was underwhelming.
It's not the restaurant's fault, they have some sidewalk real estate, and brides like to be outside in summer.

But the noise factor is significant.

Patios in clubland, bistros, trendy bars, etc., are too close to the street. Sirens, buses, trolleys and blaring radios make it smelly and hard to hear. And hot. Even fancy places, like the Jump patio at Commerce Court are fairly nice (with the fountain in the background) but as most Torontonians know, downtown is a wind tunnel. A little bit of weather or wind turns into a gale in the concrete forest, and stray jets, birds and tour buses all echo. So then, you need a mike. And why hold a wireless mike OUTDOORS in a concrete patio?

If the restaurant has indoor facilities, consider them for your ceremony and hold the cocktail hour in the outdoor patio. Then you're a bit protected and quieter. Or go to the Islands, or the bluffs or the Kortwright or even Allen's Back patio on the danforth - but avoid the financial/club district patios, if you want people at the back to hear.

Cherry Beach wedding

2010-07-14T23:13:00.002-04:00

Cherry beach (lifeguard station at left) was quiet, nice, and a little too full of cigarette butts, lurching we labradors and goose poop. But we wrote the couple's name in the sand, had a simple ceremony, and watched the sunset across the channel. Much cooler than the city.

For a fancier early morning, consider Rosetta McClain park on the bluffs - there's a nice tree/sward area (above right), or the view over the cliffs. you'll have to book it for a full wedding, but you could zip in early for a morning elopement, I expect. The City website says hours are "dawn to dusk everyday". hmmm

Sugar Beach - for a small little wedding?

2010-07-04T13:01:00.001-04:00

Promenade through Sugar Beach

Sugar Beach view onto Lake Ontario Although it hasn't officially opened, Toronto's newest park is ready for the public. Canada's Sugar Beach is one of Waterfront Toronto's many projects aimed at revitalizing the city's shoreline. Along with the recently finished Corus Quay, Sugar Beach is one of the few "completed" projects (it's not entirely finished) in the East Bayfront portion of the entire Waterfront plan.

As in all things Toronto, they probably won't issue wedding permits for this nice view - it would take too much bureaucracy. But you could certainly wander down, stand on the end, and have a short private ceremony. Until the whole place gets run over with condo-iters.

A few weddings in backyards

2010-07-03T14:51:00.001-04:00

A big one: (fiddler! piper! lots of children! potluck reception) and a lovely happy family gathering. The bride watched the gathering from the upstairs deck - in disguise - and then we all went and got her. The music lasted through the night...
Then some little ones: a dozen people in a backyard - birds and flowers and more children, signing the papers in the gazebo, champagne for all. Or just the couple and two friends as witnesses, quiet and peaceful, with a little Sarah MacLaughlan for background and some yummy food from St. Lawrence market, and then another nice wedding with the couple and parents and two special dogs, and then a couple of weddings on balconies, and a little one in the woods. In bad weather, we can meet you in our office for a wee elopement, but it's fun to set out a little repast and have a toast in the comfort of home - especially with kids and backyards!

Kortwright Centre - wedding in the woods

2010-07-03T14:43:00.000-04:00

Beautiful woodland wedding last evening - the birds were singing, a simple willow arch in the woods, handspun cloth on the signing table, birdseed for celebration - the groomsmen wore suspenders and stovepipe pants, the ladies in canary yellow and orange sundresses, and a wonderful banjo and guitar player to bring the groom and bride up the path. After supper and dancing, plans were afoot for a bonfire and singing. What could be better?

Toronto Islands - Rectory Cafe wedding

2010-06-23T22:54:00.002-04:00

Here we are, having a delightful indoor wedding in the Rectory Cafe on the Toronto Islands. The planned terrace ceremony was moved inside, as the wind and rain rapped on the windows - but we were able to go outside after the ceremony for some windy pictures on the boardwalk. The staff was great at re-arranging things, the food was lovely, the service was attentive.

This was a small informal wedding for about 30 people - and I have just asked the guests for their support for the couple. The resounding "Yes" was so hearty that we are reacting to the happy sound. Check out the great footwear.

Morning wedding at McLean House - inside and outside

2010-06-12T19:05:00.001-04:00

So the rain determined we should move inside for the ceremony, and it was quite lovely - and the wedding couple's 2 dogs behaved beautifully indoors (well, the Golden Lab behaved beautifully). Perhaps there were less distractions - like the fountain and the birds. But we couldn't have the harpist outside in the drizzle - that's too expensive for such an instrument (I used to play one).
But the clouds lifted just in time to go out into the garden and have great family shots on the grass. The wedding couple were great - and the jazz ensemble was stunning. I'll try to get the info for the musicians. Congratulations to Paul and Pierre!

A pretty dawn wedding in Ashbridges Bay

2010-06-12T14:52:00.000-04:00

A lovely family wedding at dawn at Ashbridges Bay. We're in the midst of the wedding ceremony, and the couple's young son is helpfully pointing out some sea gulls behind us (not to worry, his granny was watching him while his grandfather took pictures).

We often include small children in the ceremony, sometimes they hold the rings (in this case) and sometimes we can add a ceremony of encirclement at the end - but our young lad was so excited by the birds and the rocks that we just let him explore a bit while we did some important talking.

Wedding Musicians for Hire - Royal Conservatory

2010-06-05T09:33:00.005-04:00

Musicians for Hire
Royal Conservatory teachers will often play for your wedding. See Anita Beaty for instance (disclosure! she's a family member! who brings her own keyboard and can play any ceremony music, as well as classical and jazz for a reception)

You can also hire her students. A list of qualified and professional musicians currently studying at The Glenn Gould School is available HERE. These musicians would be delighted to play for your special event. Info:

Do you wish to hire soloist or a group of musicians?
You can usually do this with one phone call. Contact one of the soloists on the list and ask for their help in assembling a group to perform for your event. The soloists work with other musicians regularly and will probably be able to assemble a group to meet your needs.

How much does it cost to hire musicians?
Pricing should be discussed in advance, directly with the musician(s). Fees typically range from $85 to $175 an hour, per musician, plus travel expenses. Some instrument types will be more costly to hire, such as harp, due to the logistics of moving the instrument and extra time for tuning and set up. However, fees are always negotiable on a one-on-one basis. If you require further help, please do not hesitate to contact our Musicians for Hire coordinator:
Phone: 416-408-2824, ext. 888
Email: musiciansforhire@rcmusic.ca
Please allow 48 hours for a response.

A Royal Conservatory Wedding

2010-06-04T22:21:00.000-04:00

was lovely today. Great Views from the Board Room at the top, where the groomsmen hung out.
But if you aren't having a big elaborate wedding, why not choose Philosophers Walk, right down below? which is lovely and green, and has lots of little nooks. We could see it delightfully from the glass windows at the Conservatory...

Small weddings - tasks and jobs for friends and family

2010-06-01T12:14:00.001-04:00

Small family weddings are some of the most delightful, and seem easy to plan. But a) people NEED jobs, because they want to be helpful, and b) you need THEM, because the wedding couple can't do everything, especially on the day of the wedding.

So here are some tasks and suggestions for willing helpers:

1) Site selection, pre-site prep and cleanup
Whether it's the beach, your backyard, a park or a patio or your condo roofdeck, someone needs to get there early, pick up hamburger wrappers and cigarette ends, and politely inform other people that there will be a short ceremony. You need to assign someone to pick up your own discards - from ribbons to flower wrappings to champagne corks. If you're borrowing chairs, someone needs to set them up and put them back.

2) Greeting guests
Post a friend near entrances, along park roads, in the parking lot, at the corner of the block, to direct lost people. Everyone should know when you're going to try to start, and who you need to wait for, and what to do with granny.

3) Drinks - toasts - glasses
If you don't have a bar person (with a SmartServ certificate), someone needs to pro-actively handle refreshments and clean up. I have a friend who hired a 'butler in training' from a hospitality course at a community college, to go around the apartment, serve drinks and buss up, so the guests could talk and relax.

4) Music and flowers and photos
Ipod or live, someone needs to provide ambient music, and to organize plugs and playlists on the day, so the couple don't have to worry about patch cords.
You can get flowers from a corner deli - but give someone that task, and ribbons and pins and tell them to take on the task of bringing the flowers to the reception - even if its back inside the house.
If you don't have a professional photographer, deputize ONE or TWO people as 'official' photographers, and tell everyone to give them their email so they can get pix - and tell guests that there WILL be pix, so they don't all have to snap the ceremony, and can actually listen

5) Prezzies and guest book
You can get a little book from a dollar store, and ask someone to make sure everyone signs it. Ask someone to collect gift cards and presents, and bring boxes or bags to contain them. We often have to run for a kleenex box or something to hold envelopes safely.

6) Granny minding and other relative ideas
Assign someone to monitor special guests and relatives - see that they are seated, they have food and someone to talk to, and that they get a moment to talk to the couple

7) Ceremony honours
Signing the license, holding the rings, readings, lighting candles, speaking, ring warming, holding flowers, bringing the wine glass, all tasks can be split between friends and relatives to honour and recognize special people in your lives.

8) MC and Wedding-Planner-stand-in
Even in a teeny wedding, the couple are busy doing lots of tasks, and they can't micro-manage their day. One or two people can take over as 'managers', fielding phone calls, seating granny, moving the presents inside, paying the musician, caterer & officiant, organizing toasts, and assigning small errands. Thank them with a special toast AND a gift certificate for a massage, afterwards!

it's Spring! Lovely Toronto Island Wedding

2010-05-14T20:13:00.001-04:00

What a beautiful day for a small, simple wedding on Centre Island.

The couple and friends had reserved a picnic spot with a view, and we stood on the dock and performed their lovely, simple wedding ceremony and signed the papers on the picnic tables. The island was pleasantly deserted - for a Friday! More geese than people. You do have to wait a bit longer for ferries, but you can time things nicely if someone goes ahead and sets up the picnic, and then you can have a Wedding Barbecue!

Taking His Name? You Must Be A Girly Girl

2010-04-27T10:34:00.002-04:00

Taking His Name? You Must Be A Girly Girl
Can a woman take her husband's name and still be independent? The answers from society may surprise you.

"Via Broadsheet, a new study claims that women who take their husband's names are viewed with many more of the stereotypical characteristics of women:

Marital name change is not without consequences. Women who took their partner's name appear to be different from women who kept their own name on a variety of demographics and beliefs, which are more or less associated with the female stereotype (Study 1). Subsequent studies show that women's surnames are used as a cue for judgment (Studies 2-4). A woman who took her partner's name or a hyphenated name was judged as more caring, more dependent, less intelligent, more emotional, less competent, and less ambitious in comparison with a woman who kept her own name. A woman with her own name, on the other hand, was judged as less caring, more independent, more ambitious, more intelligent, and more competent, which was similar to an unmarried woman living together or a man.

How does this "less intelligent, less competent" belief play out in real life? Well, according to the study, this would result in, among other things, lower pay for job applicants"

Mary's comment: well, this is a small sample, and interesting as a discussion starter. We also see couples who MERGE their names (Pepsi + Cola = PepsiCo) or where the groom takes the bride's name, esp. when she is the 'last' in her family, or where girls take their mom's name and boys keep their dad's - all sorts of permutations these days...

Here is info on changing your name in ONTARIO

Mixed marriage couples in Canada

2010-04-25T12:58:00.005-04:00

Mixed marriage couples increasing rapidly in Canada
No news here! "Mixed" marriages, which simply means couples from different backgrounds, are so common as to be unremarkable, in my experience. Visible ethnic differences are the focus of the article, with the remarkable fact that 75% of Japanese in Canada marry non-Japanese. However, we also often marry people from different cultural & faith backgrounds. My first wedding ceremony, ten years ago, was Jewish and Catholic, which we call a 'New York wedding'. Since then, we've married Hindu and Jewish, Buddhist and Jewish, Atheist and Protestant, Mormon and Catholic, Muslim and Catholic, Jain and Atheist, Shinto and Greek Orthodox, Korean and Japanese, Russian and Irish, German and Chinese, Filipino and Indian, Celt and Trinidanian, Pagan and Catholic - and many more combinations. When you add the country of origin to the religious tradition, the ceremony are quite complex - and always interesting.

However, as a secular officiants, we include cultural traditions, but we do not perform religious traditions ourselves. We have co-officiated with spiritual leaders (especially if you have a friend or family member who would like to participate), and welcome a discussion about your wishes to honour your cultures.

Here is a wedding we did on the Toronto islands for couples from different backgrounds:

"....Conrady, 33, is originally from Germany. Chaoui, 36, is from Lebanon. “We are part of an international culture,” explained Chaoui in an interview before the wedding. “We did not want to be bound by traditions. We did not try to satisfy any vision of how it should be,” she said. “We did not want it to be conformist and we wanted it to be affordable and fun. We are not rooted in any particular culture. We could have adopted North American traditions or German or Lebanese – but they are not really ours. We are a cultural hybrid.”
For example, in the Lebanese culture traditions are varied, she explains. “It is an eclectic country,” says Chaoui. “Often people spend a fortune on weddings. And the invitations to the festivities are very open. They are less structured. Everyone in the village is invited. There’s traditional folk dancing and belly dancing.” Conrady, as well, says typical weddings in Germany are large, open affairs.
By contrast, their Ward Island wedding was intentionally small, intimate and economical. Beaty was recruited because the couple appreciates humanist ideals. “We wanted everything relaxed and open-minded,” says Conrady."

Secret little spot on the Leslie Street Spit

2010-04-23T19:28:00.001-04:00

Who built this little shrine on the Leslie St. Split? - thestar.com
Well, why not? It would make a great little elopement, if you can FIND it - (a slight secret, watch the video and guess). Even a little brick path! And you'll have to build your own shrine for a little memorial, won't you?

eco|stems ~ an environmentally and socially sustainable flower shop in toronto: Vase and Pot Amnesty!

2010-04-12T13:52:00.003-04:00

eco|stems ~ an environmentally and socially sustainable flower shop in toronto: Vase and Pot Amnesty!

Sustainable Florist! Queen Street east!

"Here at eco|stems we are always thinking of ways we can lessen our collective impact on the environment and get our customers involved. With that in mind, we wanted everyone to know that we will happily take any used vases and/or pots you've got collecting dust. Bring them in and we'll trade your vase/pot for a flower. Cracks, chips or scratches are no problem, we'll take those too! Metal, glass and ceramic etc. are all accepted.

We'll put them all to good use and keep them out of landfill. Give us a call if you have larger quantities and we'll arrange to pick them up. A big thank-you goes out to those individuals who have already brought in their vases and pots for reuse!"

Unusual wedding venues: Boats, Trains, Planes and Aeroplanes

2010-04-12T13:25:00.002-04:00

We often read of exciting weddings - bungee jumping, center ice, scuba diving, even the roller coaster. Yes, of course it's possible. You can say "I do" anywhere. Though you must always do the formal wedding paperwork (and say "I do " again) on land, with a street address. People simply get confused about the legal parts of the ceremony, and the 'ceremonial' parts.

The official Provincial registry does not (yet) use GPS coordinates for the legal location of your wedding, nor latitude and longitude. That's why you can get married ON a boat, but you have to sign the papers on land at the dock. You can have your ceremony underwater, but you have to do the legal bits on land. We have married people in boats, on rooftops, and on the train, in a special car set up with a SpeakEasy bar. But once we alight from the fun place, we must sit down and do the legal parts at a (non-moving) legal address.

I lose my mind and my lunch on roller coasters, and will NOT marry you on a ride at Canada's wonderland . I have piloted a plane, but decided not to skyjump out of one. It's too hard to HEAR in a helicopter. I love boats, and I like horses (and love Riverdale Farm, for instance!) so canoes are a definite possibility. I like hiking, and would consider remote parts of the Scarborough Bluffs, and hiking trails. But I have friends with Lyme disease, and I won't venture into tick-infested groves. No matter how idyllic.

So - leave something for the honeymoon, in terms of adventure and escape - but plan your wedding elopement in a location with an address, a view, and a minimum of moving parts.

UPDATE: Yes, we had a nice wedding on a Mariposa Cruise Line Yacht in July. We signed the papers while docked, and performed the ceremony at the Island lagoon - then I caught a water taxi and came back to Queen's Quay. A bit windy, and the party boat that crossed our bow during the ceremony was annoying, though everyone yelled "congratulations". But it's an option...

Spring! Go outside and get married!

2010-03-31T13:04:00.000-04:00

Grab two witnesses and go to the Beaches, or find a little corner of a park, or go out on your balcony, or in your backyard, or your friend's backyard - who knows? Under the trees by the river beyond the dog run at Riverdale Park? On the footbridge over the Don? Down by the lake at the bottom of High Park? wear your wedding wellies, though!

"Green" elopement locations in Toronto

2010-03-17T11:39:00.001-04:00

...are very hard to find. The parks dept would like you to book the BIG parks, and won't issue permits for the small ones for weddings. So you can hold a small informal elopement for a handful of people, if you are discreet and happy to fade into the less well known areas of parks, or the Rosedale Ravine, or Cherry Beach, or the Spit, etc. You could even discreetly gather on a NON-busy day at the foot of this pretty bridge on Center Island - which looks just like Bow Bridge in Central Park. Indoors, you can rent Allan Gardens conservatory for a small wedding (they say up to 40? seems crowded) and it's reasonable and very lovely.

But if you're dreaming of a bigger bunch of people in a sylvan glade, you may have to go out of town, to the Toronto Islands, or the Kortwright - though I disapprove of chairs in a forest [amended: we had a lovely simple wedding at the Kortwright where simple wooden chairs were on the path]. It's not THIS picture - hope to have pix shortly...
You could bring a folding chair for granny, but the rest of you should simply stand around and leave no footprint... The Toronto Regional Conservation Authority books most of the pretty places, including Black Creek Village (which also offers a glade and a green). The largest 'downtown' gathering option seems to be Woodbine "Millenium" Park, which holds 100 people, or so says the Parks Department. Kew Gardens gazebo is up to 50 people - all standing, of course, and the St. James Park (gazebo) downtown is 40 people. You can book the fountain at Center Island for 100 people, but need to ask the island authority first. Otherwise, the Music Garden has lowered its capacity from 40 to 20 people, and Sunnyside will charge a lot for a max of 40 people.

Part of the problem with park weddings is the number of people who have gone before you and ruined it all - bridezillas with chairs and high heels and videocams and altars and arches and rice... So naturally, the caretakers of our common spaces try to minimize the damage, and have restricted weddings to easily monitored spaces. This is an ongoing discussion, so we'll tag these thoughts "green" and "location", etc.

Vintage Dresses - Mirvish Village

2010-03-11T11:50:00.001-05:00

VintageBride.ca is a tiny bridal boutique tucked into Mirvish Village. It's run by the Refinery, a vintage store across the street. You can make an appointment to view their vintage bridal dresses, or go chat with the lovely person who curates the bridal collection from her desk over at the Refinery (where you can enjoy some of the fun things she brought back from Paris). Be sure to source bridesmaid dresses and accessories at Refinery, as well - and also bring along your beau for vintage clothes for men - why limit yourself to the same boring wedding + funeral suits? Linen jackets are much classier :-) Here's a post I wrote about Men and Wedding suits after a summer of red-faced grooms in black suits...

Weddings by Fountains!

2010-03-11T11:41:00.001-05:00

Spring! Small little elopements by fountains - here are some fountain locations you may know

and some more!

Websites with event spaces and private rooms

2010-03-10T12:06:00.001-05:00

Some of these are large event spaces who are already set up to hold weddings. They will usually have an event coordinator.

However, some of these are places that usually book meetings and events - but also cater for parties. Be adventurous, and contact some of the places that have NOT held weddings, and ask to book a room for a celebration. See what they will offer. Don't say "wedding" until you get the specs.

http://www.eventective.com/Canada/Ontario/Toronto/

http://www.eventsource.ca/venues.aspx

http://www.torontopubliclibrary.ca/spe_ser_rent.jsp Appel room at Toronto Reference

http://www.standrewsclub.ca/

http://www.rostiegroup.com/servicesMeetingRooms.asp has a Queens Quay location

Check smaller hotels (Drake and Gladstone will be listed in the above websites)

http://89chestnut.com/catering/home.htm Chestnut street hotel

http://metropolitan.com/toronto/meetings.asp Metropolitan Hotel behind City Hall

See other other post about private dining locations

and simply hunt around your neighborhood, and use your imagination.

Inexpensive locations for smallish weddings

2010-03-01T19:27:00.004-05:00

Are hard to find, yes? For a simple wedding ceremony, everybody standing (except Hart House), here are some ideas (aside from Condo party rooms and small restaurants and hotel suites)

DO consult your local restaurant - they often have private rooms, rooftops, back patios, all very suitable for a nice wedding. Or try:

The Music Garden, Harbourfront (no chairs, 20 people)
Hart House Chapel 30 people. Also other small pretty rooms available.
Allan Gardens 12-40 people? No chairs. Lovely plants, and rainproof.
The Gazebo at St James Garden. 40 people, 1 hour bookings (lots of pigeons tho)
The Gazebo at Kew Gardens. 50 people.
Meeting rooms and pretty lounges at your local church, if they rent to outside groups - such as Bloor Street United Church.
The Multifaith Centre at University of Toronto - lots of nice rooms for 6-100 people ask Mary (Chaplain at UofT) especially if you are staff or student.
Rectory Cafe on the Toronto Island - including their terrace.
Small terrace area and private room at Le Select Bistro

Toronto Island weddings - events and permits

2010-02-23T15:47:00.000-05:00

Of course you can hold a fancy wedding at the Yacht Club, or a not-so-fancy but lovely wedding at the Rectory Cafe. For a beach wedding, you can try to get an event permit. - be prepared to be frustrated, though. If your event is casual, picnic permits are needed for groups over 25, or for a corporate party. If you mention the word 'wedding', always say "simple, low key, no fuss, civil ceremony" - and be prepared for lots of questions about props and confetti and high heels and champagne and photographer, etc. The only officially bookable spot on the island is the fountain at Center Island, available for up to 100 people with the Parks department, though you have to check with the Island Authority first.

Here is a handy pdf of the PICNIC SPOTS on the island - all numbered. The circle with the x is a fire pit. We suggest you go exploring before you call to ask about booking a wedding spot. And here's a Toronto bride, on her way to Algonquin island for a summer wedding and reception at the Algonquin Island Association clubhouse - which IS bookable for a large party.

Weekday elopement at the CN Tower

2010-02-08T14:58:00.000-05:00

A lovely small wedding in the SKYPOD of the CN Tower - just us, a couple of witnesses, and a few German tourists...

This works best on a weekday at 10am - particularly in winter! It's a little crowded in the summer months, course - but we nearly had the skypod to ourselves.

We had lunch at CANOE afterwards - for another great view!

Make your own Wedding Rings

2010-01-28T10:51:00.001-05:00

The popular classes at the Devils Workshop are now running night at day. "...Many students are empowered by learning how to safely and properly use such tools as an oxy-propane torch and jewellery saw. Students will learn how to measure, cut, forge and polish precious metals into unique pieces of art. It is a hobby that provides a creative outlet, handcrafted gifts for loved ones and a great way to adorn yourselves in jewellery you have only imagined possible..."

We blogged about myo rings in Brooklyn a couple of years ago - and the trend is obviously widespread. You can even find places that let you put your fingerprints on the rings. If the Devil is full, consult other ateliers - who may allow you some personal input into your rings.

Make sure the gold is ethically sourced, however. Here are a few posts.
Also see conflict diamonds and no dirty gold

Elements of a simple legal marriage ceremony

2010-01-19T18:34:00.006-05:00

Couples often ask us if we will just 'sign the papers', because they want a very simple wedding ceremony, or perhaps they are planning a more elaborate ceremony later, with friends and family. While 'signing the papers' is part of a legal marriage, the Marriage Act requires that certain formalities are observed between the parties, because marriage is a legal agreement between two parties - which is enacted in a 'wedding ceremony', whether we're meeting in your kitchen, my office, the CN Tower, the beach - or in a formal location.

The MARRIAGE OFFICIANT must conduct the parts listed below.
Other persons, including family members, can offer statements, readings, blessings, introduce the couple, and also perform the ring exchange (which is not a legal requirement)

Wedding Ceremonies may thus be informal or formal, but the following parts must be included:

ASSEMBLY, STATEMENT OF PARTIES. The officiant will introduce themselves by name, as a licensed representative of the government, and announce we have assembled together at this time for the wedding ceremony of (your full legal) NAME and NAME.

WITNESS AFFIRMATION. The officiant notes the presence of the witnesses, and asks for their participation. They may also acknowledge the presence of guests - family and friends, and remember those who are not present (optional).

STATEMENT on MARRIAGE. The officiant makes a short statement about marriage, so that we all know we are present for a wedding ceremony.

The INTENTION to MARRY or CONSENT. The officiant asks the couple individually if they are here freely, knowing no legal impediment to being married, and are prepared to enter into a legal marriage at this time with the other party.

THE VOWS. The officiant asks the couple to each state out loud to the other person that they accept the other person as their legal spouse. The words can be traditional, or original.

DECLARATION. The officiant states that this contract has been entered into by these two persons, and that the witnesses have witnessed this agreement (example: "In front of us all, this couple have exchanged their promises and agreed to meet sorrow and joy as one family, and with the authority vested in me by the Province of Ontario, I declare you are now a married couple.")

The officiant, the witness/es and the couple each sign the MARRIAGE LICENSE, MARRIAGE REGISTER, CERTIFICATE of SOLEMNIZATION.

The officiant congratulates the couple and INTRODUCES THEM as a married couple.

CELEBRATION!

OPTIONAL ELEMENTS:
The Exchange of Rings, Music, Poetry, Candles, Flowers, Readings, and other rituals are traditional, and optional. THE KISS IS OPTIONAL. The couple may write their own vows, and say them in their own language. At any point during the ceremony, the couple may address their family or assembled guests, or ask a friend or family member to make remarks, to offer readings, music, or other appropriate contributions. The OFFICIANT may also read appropriate selections, as the couple requests. The couple may exchange flowers, a wine cup, tea, candles, or other symbols. The tone can be formal, informal, humorous, family-oriented, or anything you choose, as long as the required elements are included.

Be sure to ask your officiant for the options available to expand upon these required elements, or to add cultural elements from your tradition. (Glass smashing, wine toast, 7 blessings, 7 steps, tea or saki ceremony, etc.)

Removing "Obey" and "Giving Away" from Marriage vows and ceremonies

2010-01-19T17:33:00.000-05:00

because someone just asked me - here is an older article on how the Anglican and the Catholic church have each removed OBEY from their marriage service. So it's nice to know that these large congregations see no need for outmoded language. Modern marriage ceremonies also omit "Giving Away", and often include a simple affirmation of love and support for the couple, from the attending guests and family.

Lists of restaurants with private rooms

2010-01-19T10:56:00.005-05:00

(reposted from the ElopeToronto tweet)

Gayot.com
BizBash.com
RestoToronto.com

or just go into your local boite and talk nicely and see if they'll let you hold a small wedding between service (before lunch, before early dinner). We suggest you don't start out by saying "wedding", but ask if they have a quieter table for a small 'presentation' or 'celebration', then you can let them know it's actually a little private wedding ceremony, no confetti, no fuss or muss, just standing in the corner for 10 minutes, and then champagne and signing things...

we've used Le Select's back terrace as well - reasonable with a prix fixe menu - a delightful wedding. And Frank, at the AGO let us have a small elopement (6 people) at 4, just in the back when they weren't busy.We just had a little signing party at Sauvignon in the Beaches.

Sometimes you have to use your imagination - a snug at your local pub, the window area of a cafe, the upper room at a bistro, the back patio or garden of your favourite brunch place. Just chat with the staff. If you have more than 6 people in a smaller place that does not have separate "event" staff, they will probably need to assign a staff member as your waiter/server, and they may need to re-arrange tables before and after, but as long as you indicate that you're willing to order drinks and not put too many extra demands on their staff, they'll be willing to consider your event. You might start a trend!

Allan Gardens for an intimate wedding

2010-01-19T10:41:00.001-05:00

is lovely. Soft and warm in the cold winter. And very few people wandering about in mid-day, mid-week. Rather magical stepping into the conservatory from the dank grey outside. There was another fashion photoshoot happening in the south gallery; we were in the domed center. Be sure to book it for your event, don't just turn up. Info on our locations page

Steampunk wedding cake

2010-01-11T13:37:00.000-05:00

This is a UK cake company, VenusCakes, but this is such an extraordinary cake, I had to list it. If you don't know what "steampunk" is - think Murdoch Mysteries with a lot more edge and brass machines.. and, of course, laced white boots and corsets..

Steampunk is a genre of fantasy which came into prominence in the 1980’s/90’s.
It incorporates elements of the Victorian era such as steam power but also encompasses Victorian clothing such as corsets. If you are familiar with stories by Jules Verne or The Extraordinary League of Gentleman you will get an idea of the style." ..
They also have gothic cake designs and other delights. Go enjoy them.

Small weddings - rent a hotel suite

2010-01-10T15:51:00.000-05:00

You can rent a suite or just a big hotel room (try something quirky like the Gladstone or the Drake or something grander like the Royal York or King Eddy, if you want more space than the boutique hotels). The couple can stay there, (or in a smaller room), and you can have drinks catered (check about bringing in a cake or cupcakes) and hold the ceremony in the room. Then set up for a mini-reception, license signing and pictures, and take everyone to dinner in the hotel restaurant. Warm, cozy, and you don't have to hire cabs or walk through snow and slush to another venue.

Wedding photography - how much to book for an elopement?

2010-01-03T18:31:00.000-05:00

I'm NOT a photographer - and I have some very nice wedding photography colleagues. So this is a personal opinion, and not a professional one.

Wedding photographers will offer you packages based on time, and quantity/type of photos. If you are eloping (private wedding), and not having a big reception, how long do you need a photographer? (And yes, it's a great idea to have a real photographer shoot your elopement).

In our experience, it's nice to have one meet you at home, (optional), follow you to the ceremony, capture the trip (climbing the stairs at the CN tower, taking the streetcar/subway, coming up in the elevator to the rooftop, etc.) shoot the wedding and the signing of the license (20 minutes), and the hugs and happiness after (20 minutes). If you want street shots, you can ask them to follow you to another location for some aftershots (20-30 minutes).

But you don't need LOTS of shots of preparation, unless you want them. So 1 hour minimum will cover the ceremony, or 2 hours the arrival, ceremony and aftershots, or 3 hours max will cover the home shots, the wedding, and the 'just married' aftershots. A photographer needs to know the real time you'll be using their services, so choose 1,2,3 hours, and then discuss the number of pix, presentation, etc. If a photographer is also acting as a witness, it's nice to add a little gratuity as well.

We make house calls! Weddings at home

2009-12-30T20:41:00.000-05:00

We frequently perform marriage ceremonies at your apartment or home (or the Party Room of your condo, in the pix to the left, for instance). It's a nice alternative to City Hall, and you can cater your own wedding, arrange your own candles, flowers, even use your own music library.

If your apartment is small, and you've invited family, ask friends and family who have a larger apartment if you can hold the wedding there - it's a nice wedding gift to offer a space for a ceremony.

We've had lovely evening weddings by candlelight, looking out over the City - and mid-morning wedding brunches, and sunset ceremonies on the roof deck - but all are warm and friendly, and a great alternative to rented halls or impersonal court house settings.

Here is a small elopement in my living room - though we didn't have a fire in the fireplace. You can easily arrange a 'parlor wedding', with a few candles, some flowers, and some champagne.

Elopement Weddings at the CN Tower

2009-12-30T20:21:00.001-05:00

...must be discreet. All small weddings in public places are really 'guerilla' weddings, or 'ad hoc' events. As long as you have checked to see that they are not forbidden, you can always assemble and hold a little 10 minute private wedding in a public space - esp. if it's just 5 people: the officiant, the couple, and two witnesses. Avoid big wedding dresses, and other flashy items, do NOT set up video equipment to impede other tourists or bystanders, and simply assemble and hold the wedding. Think ''engagement" or "proposal" scenario. If you are interested in a bigger, flashier event, you're really going to have to consider renting the space or asking for a permit (which will probably not be granted, as security is always concerned about public access).

So - whether it's a quick duck-in to the pretty grounds at Osgoode, or a discreet event by the Botanical garden at High Park - or the CN tower, remember this is a not a formal event, unless you do the expensive paperwork. Plan accordingly!

FAQ: How to have a small private wedding in Toronto, Ontario

2009-12-11T16:45:00.002-05:00

First Things First:

Find your partner, propose, rinse and repeat. Promise to love and support each other through thick and thin, congratulate yourselves, and enjoy the happiness of your decision.

Practical steps:

1) Witnesses: You need two witnesses over the age of 18. So ask friends and family if they will help, or ask your officiant to assist in finding legal witnesses for you. Some couples hire a photographer to record their elopement, and the photographer can act as one of the witnesses. It's important to secure the witnesses as soon as possible, as their presence is legally required.

2) City Hall, or Private Ceremony? If using City Hall in any of the boroughs, investigate the booking, the costs, hours, and the protocols. The City of Toronto uses a private wedding firm and they provides a room and the officiant; the other boroughs rent you the chamber and you must find your own officiant. Remember that you usually have only 30 minutes in the chamber for the ceremony/ signing/ celebrating, so plan accordingly.

3) Officiant: If you've decided to be married privately, you need to find a legally registered Marriage Officiant, licensed by the Province to officiate at your wedding. If you are are looking for a non-religious wedding , you can go to a municipal Marriage Commissioner or City Clerk (City Hall wedding), or you can find an officiant through the Ontario Humanist Society or the Humanist Association of Toronto or the Canadian Humanist Association, or most Unitarian churches. Humanist Officiants are 'ethical' (rather than 'faith-based') clergy, and we conduct wedding ceremonies which are thoughtful, secular (non-religious), personalized to suit each couple, and legally equivalent to a City Hall or 'Civil' wedding. You can see samples of a Humanist wedding ceremony here.
You can contact me at WeddingsofToronto and I'll happily refer you to licensed officiants in the GTA.

Contact your Officiant, see if they are available, and discuss your wishes for the ceremony. Humanist and Unitarian officiants are very flexible, and will ensure that the legal requirements of the ceremony are met, while allowing you to personalize the ceremony and reflect your own style, traditions and wishes, from traditional to informal.

4) Location:

The City of Toronto says "You can get married in Ontario just about anywhere you like, provided you have a licensed minister to perform the ceremony and, if you are holding the ceremony in a public space, the proper permit."

This means you can be married in a park, in your apartment, in a loft, garden, hotel, restaurant, the CN tower, in your living room, my living room, the party room of your condo (or your friend's condo), at Ontario Place, The Toronto Islands, in a pub, in a bistro or cafe, at Hart House, Cameron House, McLean House, McKenzie House, Black Creek Farm, Riverdale Farm, your farm (or your garden allotment!) or almost anywhere else you wish. You CAN be married in a boat or an airplane, but you must sign the papers back on land. We have married couples in the skypod at the CN tower, and the skating rink at Nathan Phillips, and other fun locations. You can be married at Starbucks - but, really - you can find somewhere a little more fun. Be creative, but consider the comfort of your witnesses in a Toronto winter, or under the blazing summer sun at the end of Ashbridges Bay...

Note: the City of Toronto only issues park wedding permits for a certain number of selected parks, and they expect that you will be having a 'big' wedding. So you can gather in a small group for a simple celebration almost anywhere (just like you can go birdwatching or have an impromptu picnic with under 25 people), but if you want the white dress / bridesmaids / lots of guests / videographer- type of wedding, you will need a permit: contact the City to reserve one of the designated 'wedding' parks. Here are some ideas.

5) Marriage License:
You may obtain a marriage license from any municipality in Ontario, and use the license in Toronto or any other Ontario city. The License fee in the City of Toronto is currently $130. This fee can be paid by cash, money order, certified cheque, or credit card. The City will not refund marriage license fees once a license has been issued. The license is good for 3 months, and there is no waiting period for marriages; you can obtain the license and be married the same day. Either or both of the persons to be married may obtain the license, with appropriate identification. In Toronto, you may only obtain up a license at;

Toronto City Hall
Etobicoke Civic Centre
North York Civic Centre
Scarborough Civic Centre

York and East York Civic Centres have application forms and information only, they do not issue Marriage Licenses. LOCATION and HOURS

If you have been divorced in Canada, you must provide the original or a court-certified copy of your certificate of divorce, or Decree Absolute. If the marriage was dissolved or annulled in a jurisdiction other than Canada, the applicants must obtain authorization from the Minister of Consumer and Commercial Relations before a marriage license may be issued.

6) Little details:
Pick up flowers at a deli or corner florist. Grab a pin so you can put one of the flowers on your jacket.
Buy rings from Kensington Market, local craft stores, or make your own rings. Buy a couple of cupcakes and a split of bubbly. Make sure your camera battery is charged and your card not full. Bring your glasses to sign the license. Bring your ID for the officiant. BRING THE LICENSE.

7) When you get to your wedding location - turn off your cell phones - you can tweet afterwards.

8) GET MARRIED: Bring your partner, your witnesses, the license and go meet your officiant. If you are exchanging rings, go ahead and buy them, but rings are not REQUIRED for a legal wedding ceremony.

9) Paperwork: After the ceremony, the Marriage Officiant will sign and certify the marriage license, along with you and your witnesses. The Officiant will give you the Record of Solemnization of Marriage as a document recording the marriage. They will take the signed license and send it to the records office in Thunder Bay. After about 90 days, you may request a Record of Marriage Registration from the Province, as a final legal proof that your marriage is registered. NOTE: It is usually better to apply by mail than online. It is good practice to photocopy the Record of Solemnization, and mail a copy along with the order form - this will be a verification of your legal names and is helpful in location your form in the Ministry computer system.

In Toronto, there is only one full Service Ontario location to apply for your Record of Marriage Registration:

Service Ontario
4th Flr Unit 417,
47 Sheppard Avenue East

which can answer any questions about requesting a marriage license, or expediting your request for a certificate.

10) Celebrate! - and live happily ever after.

What to wear to an elopement

2009-12-06T16:57:00.000-05:00

Whatever you wish, of course! Dress down, dress up, bring along better shoes, change out of your woolies in the winter into something slinky, or get married in your fleeces - it's your wedding!
But you may be amused in a couple of decades to see the styles - just like you'd be amused to see my wedding pictures in a miniskirt and helmet hair.
Jackets and ties and cocktail dresses are not required for a wedding - as an officiant, my only rule is that I insist people take off their sunglasses so we can see if they're looking at each other .

But why not have fun, dress up a little, and then go and have a super meal - whenever you elope, that day will always be your wedding anniversary, so you'll be celebrating together for many years to come, dressed up or dressed down, so enjoy yourselves and have a little fun on your wedding day.

Economical Eloping - with a personal touch

2009-11-27T19:48:00.000-05:00

All you need for a wedding is a couple, two witnesses (over age 18), a marriage license and an officiant. As it says on the City of Toronto Website --
"You can get married in Ontario just about anywhere you like, provided you have a licensed minister to perform the ceremony and, if you are holding the ceremony in a public space, the proper permit" - City of Toronto

Which means you can be married in your apartment, at Sunnyside, at Ashbridge's Bay, at the CN tower, or in Jamie Kennedy's Gilead Cafe at lunch (if he doesn't mind). A wedding takes 15 minutes, plus time for signing the license, so you can be married on the subway - or the Toronto Island Ferry, if you wanted to - as long as you get OUT of the subway/ferry and sign the license at a real location. So be creative.

You can also go City Hall, and even bring along your own licensed officiant to the York, East York, North York and Scarborough City Hall Marriage Chambers, and ask the officiant to conduct a personal ceremony for you (note: you can't bring your own officiant to the City of Toronto marriage chambers, which is a privately run business, but you can use their officiants-on-call). You can reserve the City Marriage Chambers at the other boroughs for 30 minutes for about $75, and have a very personal ceremony, with just yourselves, or a small group of friends.

For almost the same money, however, you can reserve Allan Gardens, though! Be married in an indoor greenhouse in January - how lovely. Or rent the Hart House Chapel, which also allows you to bring your own officiant (ask us for info). Here is a list of other historic spots, and how to reserve them for your elopement or private wedding.

Regardless of the special spot you pick, you can make your wedding as personal and distinctive as you wish, even if it's only 4 people, the marriage officiant, and the clouds over the moon this evening..

Should you record your elopement on video?

2009-11-18T13:40:00.000-05:00

This is a completely personal concept. If you are eloping because you want an entirely private romantic wedding, a video may not be necessary or appropriate. If you want to set up a small video camera and record the ceremony for friends and family, it's another matter. You can have the ceremony and repose for pictures afterwards, or film the whole thing - but it's important you feel happy and comfortable with your choice. Be sure to discuss what you want recorded with your photographer, if you have asked them to be your witness.